10 ALTERNATIVE JOBS FOR MVP'S SPEECHWRITERS

Manny V. Pangilinan (MVP) recently took 'sole responsibility' for the plagiarism he committed when he addressed the 2010 Graduates of Ateneo University. In Pangilinan's speech, passages from J.K. Rowling's, Oprah Winfrey's and even Conan O'Brien's speeches to graduates were lifted verbatim and minimally tweaked. Not to be left out was President Barack Obama too. The two speechwriters who helped draft the speech were not named and were apparently new to the team of writers/PR/Spin Doctors of MVP.

A friend on Facebook was mulling over what possibly happened to these two speechwriters. Surely they were fired on the spot. Life shouldn't end for these two. Here's a list of possible jobs they can go into:

1. PHOTOCOPY MACHINE OPERATOR Imagine all the info they can secretly memorize while photocopying documents? They could store these in their heads and maybe someday come up with a best-selling novel.
2. PAPER SHREDDER Imagine all the info they can secretly memorize before they shred the valuable documents? One can secretly pass the documents to the other who can photocopy them before the first one feeds them to the shredder.
3. ELEVATOR MAN/WOMAN Imagine all the juicy gossip they can pick up from tenants of a posh condominium or hotel when they operate the elevators?
4. HALO-HALO VENDOR They can mix-mix all they want to their hearts content. No one will mind.
5. MAILROOM WORKER They can copy addresses and paste stamps all day.
6. PRODUCT DEMO They can talk all they want while promoting/demonstrating a product inside a mall. Nobody listens to these types anyway.
7. CALL CENTER AGENT I gather they have a good command of the English Language; they can memorize the handbook and talk to customers verbatim.
8. SCRIPTWRITER I've seen local movies where dialogue is lifted straight from foreign films. Or plot for that matter.
9. Ditto COPYWRITER I've seen local ads on TV that are poor copycats of foreign ads.
10. POLITICIAN They can lie and steal like most everyone voted into office.