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Saturday, March 6, 2010


Health Secretary Esperanza Cabral has recently gone under fire for her promotion and distribution of condoms as a means to curb the rising incidence of HIV in the country. The Catholic Bishops Conference of the Philippines (CBCP) through its President, Nereo Odchimar condemned the Secretary's stance on condom use as "unjust for government to use the money of Catholic taxpayers for purposes that are against their moral beliefs". The CBCP has also asked that the advertising of condoms on various media should be banned altogether because "condoms imperil the morality of the youth... condom advertisements desensitize the youth's delicate conscience and weaken their moral fiber as future parents".

Bravo CBCP!!! And while you're at it I say take the following hard-line measures as well to curb the decline of morals in our country. Don't single out Sec. Cabral as the church might appear to be a bully. It really is not good PR for all of you men of esteemed integrity to pick on a woman now, is it?

1. Refuse communion to all those who use condoms and other forms of contraception not allowed by the Catholic Church. No, wait, don't only refuse communion, excommunicate these infidels from the Church altogether. And most importantly deny them their last rites for not heeding the Church's teachings. Let them rot in purgatory for eternity.

2. Give an ultimatum to the owners/employees of Mercury Drug and other drugstores that sell contraceptives. They are only willing participants in the proliferation of these immoral products. Ditto 7-11, supermarkets, motels/hotels/inns that market condoms in their establishments. To these people, do as the above.

3. Make an announcement that any Catholic engaging in pre-marital sex (with or without the use of contraception) shall be treated to the same action in number 1 above.

4. The owners/manufacturers of all contraceptives including the lowliest factory workers shall be dealt the same treatment above if they do not renounce their ways and ask for forgiveness and confess their sins ASAP! Ditto the medical practitioners, nurses, health workers, patients who at one time or another engaged in the proliferation and/or use of contraceptives.

5. Demand from our law makers and local government officials to renounce the use of contraceptives and pass a bill requiring all motels/hotels to require couples to bring their marriage certificates upon check-in. Also to refuse homosexual/lesbian couples from using their facilities. In the same light, they should not allow any single person, male or female, to check-in alone -- masturbation is a sin!

6. Ban all advertisements that show models in skimpy outfits or bare skin. This will only entice fiery emotions among those who view these. Ban all movies and TV shows that allow this also. Excommunicate the entire film/TV/advertising industry for being party to these activities.

7. All students of Catholic schools shall sign a covenant that they will remain chaste before marriage. Apply a compulsory virginity test on all students. Or they face expulsion.

8. Ban all homosexual/lesbians from Catholic schools. And I mean not only the teachers, but including the employees and students. They are vile creatures!

9. Endorse Manoling Morato as the next President. he is an upright, moral man. He is also celibate even if he is not a priest -- remember, the separation of church and state.

10. Ban all the vendors along Quiapo Church selling "pamparegla", sexual toys, and pirated DVD's that are pornographic.

Bravo to the CBCP! Take the hard-line! Now is the time for change! Corruption is not the cause of our country's woes -- it is IMMORALITY!

Kudos to the church for saying mass in Malacanang during Erap's and GMA's time. They needed your support even though the majority of the populace have been swayed by infidels spreading rumors of their corruption. Forgive Erap for his womanizing and gambling at least he does not use condoms or asks his women to use contraceptives, otherwise he won't have all those children, right? Continue to bless and give GMA communion -- only if she sacks Sec. Cabral and other cabinet members who espouse the use of contraceptives!

Bravo CBCP! Ignore the scientific facts that AIDS is spreading -- these are mere rumors being propagated by the manufacturers of condoms. Ignore heretical science! Ask the Vatican to renounce their apology that the Sun is the center of the universe. Ask the Pope to decree that indeed, the Earth is the center of the universe!

Never mind if you excommunicate a lot of people, this will not have a dent on your wealth. You still have loads of income from the schools and weekly tithes of churchgoers.

Now dear reader, be a good Catholic and go to confession tomorrow. Or risk eternal damnation!

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